rearrangin...

...is the name of the game these days. as most of yall have probably experienced yourselves - we tend to fill the space we have. so needless to say, every closet and shelf and nook in this farm house are occupied by josh and lindsey stuff.

we've waited a long time to make room for a baby....so this current wave of sortin thru clothes and cleanin our drawers is such a joy! the usual burdens and frustrations and embarrassments of havin way too much stuff are bein overshadowed by the delight of the very reason we're doin all of this in the first place. how can i be annoyed by shufflin thru t-shirts we haven't worn in 3 years when onsies and and footsie-pajamas and diapers will soon take up residence in that drawer? let me assure you, it's quite impossible.

thus far, the livin room furniture has been moved around to fit a rockin chair near the stove....my shoes are now hangin out in one of those over-the-door organizers...work clothes are in the yaffa blocks my shoes used to be in (wanna give a quick shout-out to yaffa blocks! whoop!!)...and various not-worn-very-often-clothes are now in plastic tubs under the bed rather than a few necessary drawers.

i'm quite proud of myself....as i'm sure my organizationally-minded and more strategic friends will appreciate.

and that's the weekend update. next on the list: closets.

to the store...and beyond....

we went to the dreaded wal-mart the other day, needin to return a couple things...like the package of white t-shirts i had bought josh. i was so proud of my cheaper-than-usual price...until i got home and realized they were so cheap b/c they were boys shirts...not mens. so much for my frugality! anyway, we went to wal-mart and got our money back in cash and decided we'd go look at baby stuff w/the possibility of actually buyin somethin.

eek! our first trip to the baby section w/money in hand. glad it was only about $13.

we looked and oohed and awwed....touchin all the soft, cuddly stuffed animals...holdin up the tiny little shirts that hardly cover the palm of josh' hand... and then josh convinced me to try to squeeze my big noggin into a kid's baklava w/bunny ears on top. i acquiesced of course, and he took a picture and sent it to my mom. can't beat technology.

i must confess at this point - an almost constant dilemma in me these days... figurin out how to smart shop. i want to lessen my contribution to this world's environmentally downward spiral...so even bein IN wal-mart is a bit contradictory...but we also live in rural texas, so local-anything isn't prolific...and then you throw in there the whole cost of it all...the cheaper diapers are probably the most non-biodegradable item in the store, but who knows if the "green ones" are really any better? and again, i'm in wal-mart.

so even though the cute little beanies and two washrags we bought are probably synthetic and made in mass quantities overseas, we've officially made our first baby purchases. if i knew how to load a picture onto the blog, i would. maybe i'll get josh to help me :)

so...

we're gettin lots of questions these days....how the adoption's goin...if we're excited...what we've bought...what news do we have.... and really, i don't feel like we have very succinct answers.

the adoption is goin as well as can be hoped for at this point, but there's not a whole lot actually happenin. the baby is due december 30 (although josh is absolutely certain she's comin on the 22nd), and b/w now and then, there's not a whole lot to do but wait. we wait and hope and hold our breath and then keep goin.

i'm not sure if i've explained this yet or not...if i have, skip this paragraph and go onto the next... in the state of texas, birthmother's cannot sign their relinquishment of rights papers until at least 48hrs after the birth. it makes sense, really - it ensures that a pregnant woman isn't making decisions about her unborn child until that child is born. unfortunately in adoption, this is where so much of the risk lingers. until the baby's born, and until the mom signs the papers, it's simply not a done deal.

so....here we sit in october...w/a birthmother who verbalizes clearly her intentions and her wishes...but there's not a single final, legal thing in place until at least 2 days after the birth.

so we wait.

are we excited? of course we're excited... we talk about the baby girl we so hope will be ours...we laugh and get teary and talk about the color pink. josh can see himself carryin her around in one of those pack things while he's walkin thru academy....i can feel her against my chest...we're eager for the mornin we get to take her to church for the first time. and in the very same breath, we're hesitant...we're hesitant to talk too much...to plan too much...to buy too much...

as for stuff....my family's bought us a stroller and a pack-n-play and a few pink odds and ends... josh and i have actually not bought a single thing yet. there have been talks of showers and gifts, but we've opted to wait until after we're home w/her to have such celebrations.

so that's where we are....how we are....

and, as always, we are grateful for yall's prayers and words of encouragement and hope....